Disability – Page 3 – Made of Stardust and Stubbornness

Existing As I Am

Posted on February 27, 2025May 9, 2025 by Jen

As someone who has spent their entire life proving the doubters wrong with regard to disability, I am not surprised at the way things are going. When you live in a world where a baby’s potential value is judged within days after birth, it’s not surprising that some people would rather we just disappeared (or died).

I was born in 1979 in Texas, of all places. Apparently I came out the blue and it took a lot of work to keep me alive the first night. At least one doctor told my parents that even if I lived I’d be blind, deaf and intellectually disabled. Thankfully there was another doctor who said I’d most likely be fine. There’s even a story that I kicked out the sides of the incubator I was in at one point. Here I am four and a half decades later, and while I’m hard of hearing, have a facial disfigurement and vision issues, there’s no sign of an intellectual disability. Not that it should have mattered. All lives are worthy – having an intellectual disability shouldn’t have meant I was better off dead or institutionalized either.

A large issue with having to prove doubters wrong is the way we have to constantly prove our worth. Things like excellent behavior, getting the best grades in school, going to college, graduating with distinction, getting a good job and doing our best at it, are all signs that it is worth keeping us alive. We’re proving our worth to a society that thinks we shouldn’t exist at all. We shouldn’t have to prove anything – a disabled person who doesn’t do well in school or a job and struggles with everything shouldn’t deemed less worthy than someone who is successful. You only have to take one look at media that glorifies successful disabled people and says things like, “they never let their disability stop them” to see the truth. In reality it almost never is our disabilities stopping us. It was the ableism of society making assumptions about our worth.

It’s not surprising that society also judges people based on their relationships. We’re supposed to date, get married and have kids all for the betterment of society. And of course, we must find someone of the opposite gender to do all of this with. Any deviation from that norm is seen as abnormal and wrong. Unfortunately, there is an assumption that disabled people are exempt from this because we’re not worthy enough to date, get married or have kids. As a result, some disabled people may strive to prove that assumption wrong by doing exactly what is expected.

Those of us who are asexual and/or aromantic are often assumed to be that way because of our disabilities, which causes conflict in both groups. The truth is we are asexual and/or aromantic while also being disabled, and not because of it, and there shouldn’t be anything wrong with that. I’ve known for years I was asexual – I never had any interest in dating or anything. Aromantic was a word I learned more recently and also fit. There isn’t any particular reason why I am asexual and aromantic, I just am.

Gender has always been something in the background for me, as being hard of hearing and dealing with that – and other issues – took up most of my focus. I had to navigate communication issues with everyone, almost all of the time. It’s not fun having to remind people that I am in fact hard of hearing, even with my hearing aids on. As a result I never really thought about it all that much, other than knowing I didn’t enjoy typical girl things. I didn’t like dolls or makeup or bright colors that girls are often expected to like. But it is also true that my parents never really made that much of a big deal about it.

Within the last few years, I’ve really come to understand what being non-binary or agender means, and realized that it describes me. Agender probably fits best as I don’t really feel particularly drawn to any gender specifically. Having said that, I generally don’t mind female-gendered terms, with some exceptions. I don’t particularly like being called lady, as an example. On the flip side, I would much rather be called my parents’ daughter than child, because I’m an adult and the word “offspring” just sounds weird. But these are my own personal preferences – everyone else should be allowed to describe themselves on their own terms.

As I said at the beginning, I’m not surprised at the direction we’re going right now. And as I work out my gender and learn more about the trans/non-binary communities I see the same battles and the same struggle to be allowed to exist. I recently read the article “The fight against ableism mirrors the fight against transphobia” written by Ayman Eckford at PinkNews, which has a lot to say about what’s going on. Anyone who doesn’t fit the assumed norm is under attack right now by the current administration, and as always it’s about ableism:

“Throughout history, ableism has been used against women to justify gender inequality, against Jewish people to justify the Holocaust, against people of colour to justify slavery and colonialism, and, of course, against the LGBTQ+ community.”

I am Jen Rohrig. I am hard of hearing, asexual, aromantic, agender and likely autistic. Proving the doubters wrong is the goal every day. Existing exactly as I am is the goal every day. I believe we all deserve to be able to be exactly who we are and exist as who we are, because we’re all human, with our various identities and differences.

Reading List

“Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-First Century” edited by Alice Wong
“Being Seen: One Deafblind Woman’s Fight to End Ableism” by Elsa Sjunneson
“Black Disability Politics” by Sami Schalk
“The Future Is Disabled – Prophecies, Love Notes and Mourning Songs” by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
“Ace and Aro Journeys: A Guide to Embracing Your Asexual or Aromantic Identity” by The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project
“Gender: Your Guide: A Gender-Friendly Primer on What to Know, What to Say, and What to Do in the New Gender Culture” 2nd Edition by Lee Airton (make sure to get the 2024 edition)
“Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex” by Angela Chen
“Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture” by Sherronda J. Brown
“Ending the Pursuit: Asexuality, Aromanticism, and Agender Identity” by Michael Paramo

“Model Home” Review

Posted on February 8, 2025May 9, 2025 by Jen

“Model Home” by Rivers Solomon

The three Maxwell siblings keep their distance from the lily-white gated enclave outside Dallas where they grew up. When their family moved there, they were the only Black family in the neighborhood. The neighbors acted nice enough, but right away bad things, scary things—the strange and the unexplainable—began to happen in their house. Maybe it was some cosmic trial, a demonic rite of passage into the upper-middle class. Whatever it was, the Maxwells, steered by their formidable mother, stayed put, unwilling to abandon their home, terrors and trauma be damned.

As adults, the siblings could finally get away from the horrors of home, leaving their parents all alone in the house. But when news of their parents’ death arrives, Ezri is forced to return to Texas with their sisters, Eve and Emanuelle, to reckon with their family’s past and present, and to find out what happened while they were away. It was not a “natural” death for their parents . . . but was it supernatural?

Rivers Solomon turns the haunted-house story on its head, unearthing the dark legacies of segregation and racism in the suburban American South. Unbridled, raw, and daring, Model Home is the story of secret histories uncovered, and of a queer family battling for their right to live, grieve, and heal amid the terrors of contemporary American life.

Review

I can always count on Rivers Solomon to write something deeply disturbing and powerful while exploring various themes and this book, with the central themes of trauma, memory, racism/segregation, and parenting, was no different. There are a lot of different layers to what was actually going on due to Ezri’s (along with their siblings’) memories not being completely reliable. It’s clear their ongoing trauma has caused all of their memories are muddled and mixed up with what they believe happened and what actually happened. The truth does come out in the end and it’s even worse than you might expect.

The writing style might take some getting used to as it’s somewhat stream of conscious deeply in Ezri’s head but I think it works once you get used to it. The ending is a bit abrupt and there are unanswered questions but it makes sense for the story. That said there is also the sense that the unresolved issues that still need to be worked out, between the siblings, will be more than they were before.

I will be re-reading Rivers Solomon’s other books to add reviews to my blog. I’ve enjoyed all of them!

Warnings and additional reviews can be found on the StoryGraph page for “Model Home” by Rivers Solomon

Book Details

Author’s Website
: Rivers Solomon
Publisher / Date: MCD, October 2024
Genre: Mystery, Thriller
Page Count: 286
Completion Date: February 7, 2025

“Màgòdiz” by Gabe Calderón

Posted on January 26, 2025May 9, 2025 by Jen

“Màgòdiz” by Gabe Calderón

Everything that was green and good is gone, scorched away by a war that no one living remembers. The small surviving human population scavenges to get by; they cannot read or write and lack the tools or knowledge to rebuild. The only ones with any power are the mindless Enforcers, controlled by the Madjideye, a faceless, formless spiritual entity that has infiltrated the world to subjugate the human population.

A’tugwewinu is the last survivor of the Andwanikadjigan. On the run from the Madjideye with her lover, Bel, a descendant of the Warrior Nation, they seek to share what the world has forgotten: stories. In Pasakamate, both Shkitagen, the firekeeper of his generation, and his life’s heart, Nitawesi, whose hands mend bones and cure sickness, attempt to find a home where they can raise children in peace without fear of slavers or rising waters. In Zhong yang, Riordan wheels around just fine, leading xir gang of misfits in hopes of surviving until until the next meal. However, Elite Enforcer H-09761 (Yun Seo, who was abducted as a child, then tortured and brainwashed into servitude) is determined to arrest Riordan for theft of resources and will stop at nothing to bring xir to the Madjideye. In a ruined world, six people collide, discovering family and foes, navigating friendship and love, and reclaiming the sacredness of the gifts they carry.

With themes of resistance, of ceremony as the conduit between realms, of transcending gender, Màgòdiz is a powerful and visionary reclamation that Two-Spirit people always have and always will be vital to the cultural and spiritual legacy of their communities.

Review

This was a really interesting and complex book with great characters. I really liked how everything developed and the way the characters ended up working together. I enjoyed the complicated ending and the fact that it ends with hope for a better future. The world building was interesting though I did feel like things could have been explained in a bit more detail. However that may have been intentional since a lot of information had been lost and what was left was very personal, including cultural stories that aren’t for outsiders. That said I really enjoyed the oral story telling aspect of the book and the various stories that were told throughout. I also liked the gender and disability representation in the book as well and the way both aspects just existed as part of the story.

The book does get fairly graphic in places both with regard to the violence the characters experience and the bleakness of the dystopian future. There are also a couple sex scenes near the end of the book that are somewhat graphic as well.

Warnings and additional reviews can be found on the StoryGraph page for “Màgòdiz”.

Book Details

Author’s Website: Gabe Calderón
Publisher / Date: Arsenal Pulp Press, November 2022
Genre: Science Fiction
Page Count: 284
Completion Date: January 22, 2025

“Everything for Everyone” Review

Posted on January 19, 2025May 9, 2025 by Jen

“Everything for Everyone: An Oral History of the New York Commune, 2052–2072”
by M. E. O’Brien and Eman Abdelhadi

By the middle of the twenty-first century, war, famine, economic collapse, and climate catastrophe had toppled the world’s governments. In the 2050s, the insurrections reached the nerve center of global capitalism—New York City. This book, a collection of interviews with the people who made the revolution, was published to mark the twentieth anniversary of the New York Commune, a radically new social order forged in the ashes of capitalist collapse.

Here is the insurrection in the words of the people who made it, a cast as diverse as the city itself. Nurses, sex workers, antifascist militants, and survivors of all stripes recall the collapse of life as they knew it and the emergence of a collective alternative. Their stories, delivered in deeply human fashion, together outline how ordinary people’s efforts to survive in the face of crisis contain the seeds of a new world.

Review

This was a very interesting book about how things could be. It’s written as if it’s a non-fiction book of interviews with various people who survived all the uprisings and disasters and now live in what’s left of New York. The authors (who are academics) are written as themselves doing the interviews with fictional interviewees. It’s vitally important to read the introduction to this book as it explains the future setting and who the various people are. I think a lot of people are tempted to skip introductions to non-fiction books, but this one does the work of explaining what actually happened between now and the future setting.

I think there’s a lot of good world building within the book, and while there is a lot of telling instead of showing I think it makes sense given the chosen format. That said I do think there are very obvious gaps in explaining everything. We get a general sense that things are better now for everyone but only on a surface level. We don’t really know for sure how things have been resolved – is racism still a thing? Sexism? Etc.

In addition, while disabled people are mentioned don’t really get a sense of how things are for disabled people in general in this future. While many of the interviewees have mental trauma and mental health issues there wasn’t anyone with a physical or sensory or cognitive disability. I would have liked it better if at least one interviewee had been disabled themselves instead of just mention of specific individuals with disabilities.

In general though I do believe the book works as an idea of how things could be and depicts a hopeful future after a series of disasters even if I wasn’t entirely convinced that everything is for everyone in this future.

Warnings and additional reviews can be found on the StoryGraph page for “Everything for Everyone”

Book Details

The cover of Everything for Everyone depicts a map of a flooded future New York City showing what's left of the boroughs and the water ways around them over the land is a series of lines crossing every which way. The title is in the top left corner with the authors names.

Authors’ Websites: M. E. O’Brien and Eman Abdelhadi
Publisher / Date: Common Nations / August 2022
Genre: Science Fiction
Page Count: 256
Completion Date: January 19, 2025

“Power to Yield” Review

Posted on December 15, 2024April 13, 2025 by Jen

“Power to Yield and Other Stories” by Bogi Takács

Power to Yield is a collection of speculative tales exploring gender identity, neurodivergence, and religion from author Bogi Takács, who deftly blends sci-fi, fantasy, and weird fiction.

An AI child discovers Jewish mysticism. A student can give no more blood to their semi-sentient apartment and plans their escape. A candidate is rigorously evaluated for their ability to be a liaison to alien newcomers. A young magician gains perspective from her time as a plant. A neurodivergent woman tries to survive on a planetoid where thoughts shape reality . . .

These are stories about the depth and breadth of the human condition—and beyond—identifying future possibilities of conflict and cooperation, identity and community.

Review

All of the stories in the collection are interesting and I enjoyed reading them a lot. There are multiple concepts explored in each of the stories with a lot of focus on communication and conflict resolution. I really liked the blending of themes (gender identity, neurodivergence, and religion) in the stories and how things fit together in different ways.

I do think it’s important for readers to read the Forward, written by Ada Hoffmann, for additional context about the stories and the author. There are also additional notes from the author about each story at the end.

“FOUR-POINT AFFECTIVE CALIBRATION” – This one is interesting because the narrator is teaching aliens about human emotions through a machine learning system, but they are multiply marginalized. As a result the narrator is concerned about assumptions others have made and will make about them. A the same time though it’s clear the narrator has a good handle on their own thoughts and emotions as they process everything and would just like to meet the aliens.

“AN ERRANT HOLLY SPARK” – The framing device for this story is that the narrator, an AI child, has been kidnapped and is talking to their kidnapper. However it goes much deeper than that as we learn how the narrator was “created” by their mother and all that it means. There’s a lot of Jewish concepts in this story as well. It makes for an interesting story about what it means to be a person. The ending has a good twist because of how things played out with the things the child learned as they grew.

“AND I ENTREATED” – In this story a Jewish woman was transformed into a houseplant for a spy mission but there is a delay in returning her to human form. A translator is provided but there are a lot of complicating factors involved. There’s actually a lot of different things going on in this story but mostly it’s about failure to communicate (even when you should be able to) and figuring out how to fit gender stuff in Jewish tradition.

“FOLDED INTO TENDRIL AND LEAF” – There are two mage students in love, while one is away at war the other is turned into a plant as punishment. Unfortunately their teacher is captured and the first student returns unaware of what has happened. Interesting story told from each student’s point of view.

“THE THIRD EXTENSION” – This one is very short and from the point of view of sapient plants. A story about living on the outskirts of society and trying to blend in and not be noticed. I liked it but would liked to have seen things explored in more depth (but it works as it is).

“ON GOOD FRIDAY THE RAVEN WASHES ITS YOUNG” – An interesting story about someone who is a intersex newcomer, to another colony and ends up finding kinship in an unexpected place. I’m not entirely certain about the ending but I did like the ideas in it.

“VOLATILE PATTERNS” – a group of people try to use magical designs in their clothing not realizing the meaning of the designs. It goes about as well as you’d expect… Good story with interesting concepts. There’s some language barriers involved and things get a little chaotic. I liked how it played out though.

“THE LADYBUG, IN FLIGHT” – a member of a space hive mind speaks with the only survivor of a spaceship disaster. Since it’s entirely from the hive minds point of view they don’t entirely understand what has happened or what it means for the other people that were on the ship. Interesting read though about the hive mind appreciating the contact they have with the survivor and are helping the individual get home.

“THE 1ST INTERSPECIES SOLIDARITY FAIR AND PARADE” – in a post-apocalyptic world where Earth has been invaded by two different alien species and the visited by a third. Trying to get different groups of people to participate in a collaborative proves to be as complicated as it always is even without the need to trust this third set of aliens. Good ending for this one. This story is also a sequel to “Given Sufficient Desperation” which appeared in “Defying Doomsday”.

“A TECHNICAL TERM, LIKE PRIVILEGE” – A person is living in a a blood-sucking sentient housebeast and is struggling provide the needed offerings. Trying to get help from others proves impossible because of perceived privilege. Interesting concepts and I liked how it worked out.

“POWER TO YIELD” – This one is a novella-length story about an individual’s research project turning into a life-long vocation. There’s a few ways to interpret this one because of who the characters are but it makes for an interesting and complex story that speaks to what it means to be able to make your own choices even if others think you shouldn’t. I really enjoyed this one and thought it was a good story to end the collection with.

The author has included warnings for each of the stories at the end of the book. Additional reviews can also be found at the StoryGraph page for “Power to Yield”

Book Details

Author’s Website: Bogi Takács
Publisher / Date: Broken Eye Books, November 2023
Page Coumt: 190 pages
Genre: Science Fiction, Short Stories
Completion Date: December 15, 2024

“Defying Doomsday” Review

Posted on December 15, 2024April 13, 2025 by Jen

“Defying Doomsday” edited by Tsana Dolichva and Holly Kench

Teens form an all-girl band in the face of an impending comet. A woman faces giant spiders to collect silk and protect her family. New friends take their radio show on the road in search of plague survivors. A man seeks love in a fading world. How would you survive the apocalypse?

Defying Doomsday is an anthology of apocalypse fiction featuring disabled and chronically ill protagonists, proving it’s not always the “fittest” who survive – it’s the most tenacious, stubborn, enduring and innovative characters who have the best chance of adapting when everything is lost.

Review

This is a great collection of stories! There aren’t a lot of people with disabilities in most post-apocalyptic stories and when there are they’re often the first to be killed off. Usually because the plot acts as if they can’t possibly cope with the world or will be a burden to others in the group. This collection of stories shows how disabled people can both survive and thrive different scenarios. While there are a few stories where the disabilities have more impact on how things go in general the disabilities are just part of the characters life which I liked.

“And the Rest of Us Wait” by Corinne Duyvis – while staying in a shelter waiting out the results of an impending comet a young woman decides to create a band. This story does a good job of showing what people can be like in a disaster for good and bad. Tensions can increase when it seems as though people are getting different treatment even when it’s made clear that the different treatment is because of disability or illness (upset over different food when one person needs an alternative to what everyone else is getting). Frustrating but true to reality I like the defiance of the main character in this story to just exist as they are.

“To Take Into the Air My Quiet Breath” by Stephanie Gunn – Three siblings struggle to survive with needed medical supplies running out. This one is a bit strange in motivation of the main character. They’re all young of course and making choices adults might not have. I did like it but I wish there was more of an ending for this one. As it stands it feels more like the first chapter of a longer book rather than a short story.

“Something in the Rain” by Seanan McGuire – Something in the rain has killed people and a lone survivor does their best to live. This one gets little dark when another survivor comes along but when that person ends up being a bully and continues to be so I can’t really blame the main character for making the choices they do. Sometimes you really do just want to be left alone in the world.

“Did We Break the End of the World?” by Tansy Rayner Roberts – teens scavenging the best they can and figuring out how to make things work after a pulse shuts down everything. A bit of a strange story as turns out things are more complicated than they seem. Interesting story though. I did wish one plot point hadn’t happened but it made sense given the full context of their reality.

“In the Sky with Diamonds” by Elinor Caiman Sands – a young woman is trying to survive an alien attack and make sure her sister’s ship escapes when a discovery is made about the truth of their attack. This one gets interesting towards the end as thins are figured out. I liked the way the situation was resolved.

“Two Somebodies Go Hunting” by Rivqa Rafael – Two young siblings go out to find food and figure themselves out at the same time. This one is fun, I liked the way it played out with the siblings actually coming to understand each other better but not entirely in the way you’d expect. The ending is really nice.

“Given Sufficient Desperation” by Bogi Takács – aliens are keeping humans in a camp where they are made to describe various objects. This one is a bit strange but enjoyed reading it. It’s not entirely clear what the aliens are trying to do but some assumptions can be made based on the way they react in the end. I liked the idea that it’s resolved because people don’t always follow the rules of behavior.

“Selected Afterimages of the Fading” by John Chu – life in a fading world where if you don’t pay enough attention to object they disappear. It’s further complicated by the main characters perceptions of reality due to illness. It took a bit to figure this one out but it was interesting because of how the main character’s disability seemed to make things more AND less complicated with what is going in the world.

“Five Thousand Squares” by Maree Kimberley – Two families deal with a disaster. I enjoyed this one a lot. There’s some deeper elements involve between the two mothers of the family with their different worldviews but it’s an interesting story.

“Portobello Blind” by Octavia Cade – a young woman is left alone on a island where her father’s research lab was located. I really enjoyed how this one goes. The main character needs to figure out how to survive alone without anyone to help.

“Tea Party” by Lauren E Mitchell – a group from a mental health ward survive the apocalypse together. I really liked the way this one plays out with the main character going to see if they can find more supplies and the way the characters interact on their return. A good found family grouping – and I like how things are being handled too with everyone’s needs being accommodated.

“Giant” by Thoraiya Dyer – a teenager has been left behind on a space station after everyone dies during an alien invasion. The story is more complicated than it seems and I liked the way it played out. The ending is a bit abrupt but I liked the concepts in it.

“Spider-Silk, Strong as Steel” by Samantha Rich – large spiders have taken over the world and one person is able to hunt for spider silk. Good story with a lot of interesting things about it.

“No Shit” by K L Evangelista – Two survivors of a plague find each other and start traveling… Sort of a humorous take a the concept as thing are exaggerated a bit and there’s more silliness thank you’d expect. It’s a fun read though and the ending is great.

“I Will Remember You” by Janet Edwards – an alien invasion story where people are being killed off each day. Interesting story and I liked how it played out.

Warnings and additional reviews are available on the StoryGraph page for “Defying Doomsday”

Book Details

The cover of Defying Doomsday shows a young person standing facing the distance where a light is shinning down from the sky to the ground where three figures are walking towards it. It would appear to be two adults and a child. The sky is overcast and dark blue and the ground links like dried cracked mud. The title is at the top left and the editors names are at the bottom.

Publisher / Date / Website: Twelfth Planet Press, May 2016
Genre: Young Adult, Post-Apocalyptic, Science Fiction
Page Count: 325
Completion Date: December 14, 2024